Boy it has sure turned cold here lately. It seems like we had about 2 or 3 weeks of fall then it jumped right into winter. It got into the high 20's last night and there was frost on the ground when I went out to my car this morning. When I was a kid, I remember frost as being something fun to play around in. Nowadays, it is just another reason for my bones to hurt - lol. At least when it is so cold outside it keeps the fog away.
Speaking of cold, I think I am getting one. My throat has been sore for the last few days and now my head hurts and my ears are getting a little plugged up. And my nose is all stuffy. I hate getting colds. But at least I don't have pneumonia like my brother has. Still, I feel like crap and wish I was home in my warm bed instead of freezing here at work. Why's it gotta be so cold in here???
All this coldness has given me a cold heart, too. I am not thrilled about Christmas coming up. I am not in the celebrating mood. It just won't be the same this year without my grandma. We have always had Christmas with my grandma, it seems. And to have it without her just seems wrong. And sad. I feel a little disillusioned and down about the whole holidays thing right now. But maybe that's just because I have a headache and am mad about that - lol.
Thursday, November 30, 2006
Some may say that I'm a dreamer...
| You Are a Dreaming Soul |
 Your vivid emotions and imagination takes you away from this world So much so that you tend to live in your head most of the time You have great dreams and ambitions that could be the envy of all... But for you, following through with your dreams is a bit difficult You are charming, endearing, and people tend to love you. Forgiving and tolerant, you see the world through rose colored glasses. Underneath it all, you have a ton of passion that you hide from others. Always hopeful, you tend to expect positive outcomes in your life. Souls you are most compatible with: Newborn Soul, Prophet Soul, and Traveler Soul |
Christmas's top 20 most unwanted
20 Things I don't want for Christmas:
1. A box of nails
2. A giant poster of Steven Seagal
3. Frozen asparagus
4. A year-supply of Rice-A-Roni
5. Nose hair clippers
6. Tickets to see Barbara Streisand
7. A bottle of Drain-O
8. Ballroom dancing lessons taught by a man named Bubba
9. OJ's book
10. Screech's sex tape
11. A book on advanced geometry
12. Britney Spears's hair extensions
13. Wet Dog scented candles
14. A half-eaten bag of Cheetos
15. A free haircut by Howie Mandel's hair stylist
16. A rusty can opener
17. Tickets to see the world's largest lint collection
18. Kevin Federline's CD
19. A Mike Tyson fridge magnet
20. Parachute pants
Funny Stuff From Dave Barry
"Alert reader Doe Clark sent in a newspaper article with this headline: 'Officials Crack Down on 'Bathtub' Cheese.' The article states: 'San Diego County health officials warned against buying or eating cheeses made in bathtubs that were being sold door to door.' It is not totally clear, from this wording, whether it is the cheese that is being sold door to door, or the bathtubs. To be on the safe side, we urge residents of San Diego Country to avoid both bathing AND eating suspicious cheese."
Stupid News Story of The Day
(My God is an angry God.)
Gun-waving sermon lands pastor in pokey
MOUNT AIRY, N.C. - The pastor of a Mount Airy church accused of brandishing a gun as part of his sermon is free on bond after being charged with possession of a firearm by a felon.
Jerry Wayne "Dusty" Whitaker, 58, of Mount Airy, was convicted in Virginia in 1990 of conspiracy to distribute cocaine and possession of a firearm during drug trafficking.
Members of Whitaker's Victory Baptist Church say they had no knowledge of his criminal background. Whitaker told them he was a retired Virginia state police officer and a retired U.S. marshal who was injured in the line of duty, said Garry Scearce, trustee chairman at Victory Baptist.
Whitaker denies ever telling anyone he was a marshal, but said he worked as a police officer for six years in Montgomery County, Va.
In September, Whitaker reportedly brought a handgun and a shoulder holster to a service.
"He was driving home his point," Scearce said. "He said he was no longer a pistol-toting U.S. marshal.' He was a pastor."
Whitaker said the gun was a toy prop.
"I use parables," he said. "Once I pretended to be a blind man with a cane, glasses and can with coins. Why didnt they arrest me for impersonating a blind man?"
Whitaker was arrested during church services Sunday. He was released Monday after posting a $20,000 bond.
___
Information from: Mount Airy News, http://www.mtairynews.com
Wednesday, November 29, 2006
Caption This!
Wait a minute. Aren't there supposed to be seven of us? And aren't we supposed to be swimming?
Post your own funny caption in a comment if you wanna.
Funny Stuff From Dave Barry
Holiday Gift Guide:
Sporty Electric Bug-Zapping Racket
"Here's the ideal gift for the person on your holiday gift list who enjoys playing sports AND killing flying insects. This is a tennis-racket-shaped device that, thanks to the scientific miracle of batteries, has electricity in it, so that when you swat a flying insect, the insect is instantly electrocuted! OK, maybe not instantly. We tested this device extensively last summer while on vacation, and we found that, if you managed to make contact with a flying insect, the zapper tended to stun it, rather than kill it, so it wound up sort of flopping around on the floor. The bad news was, this meant that you had to then kneel down on the floor and finish the insect off with more zapping. The good news was, we were with a seven-year-old boy who really enjoyed doing this. Be advised that this device is capable of delivering a mildly painful shock to a human. Be further advised that this feature is especially popular with seven-year-old boys."
Stupid News Story of The Day
(Those must have been some roomy pants!)
Owner: Man tried to hide guitar in pants
DE QUEEN, Ark. - The guitar-shaped bulge in Morgan Conatser's clothing tipped off a music store owner that there might be a crime in progress. Clifton Lovell, owner of Guitars and Cadillacs on U.S. Highway 71 in De Queen, was talking with a customer last week when he saw Conatser, 29, walking out of the store.
"I saw him walking out to his pickup truck and the bulges in his leather jacket. I said, 'Hey what have you got there,'" Clifton Lovell said.
He said Conatser, 29, replied, "Nothing."
Lovell pointed toward the unnatural shapes in Conatser's jacket and pants and said, "You've got something."
Conatser then removed a solid body electric guitar from his pants leg and from underneath his jacket.
"The neck of the guitar was almost down to his knee and the back of the guitar was almost up to his neck. It wasn't hard to spot. There was no way he could sit down or get into the pickup," Lovell said.
With the guitar back in the store, Lovell didn't intend to call the sheriff's office. But then he discovered a wireless sound system was missing. Lovell called the Sevier County Sheriff's Department and gave a description of Conatser and his pickup.
Deputy Jeff Wahls called Conatser's father, who told Wahls how to find the house.
The deputy found Conatser at home, where Conatser went to his bedroom closet and retrieved the sound system, Wahls said.
"He made a statement saying he needed the property because he needed to make ends meet," Wahls said.
Conatser was arrested on a charge of theft of property under $500 for the sound equipment because the guitar had already been returned to the shop owner. The sound system was worth about $200.
"This is a new one on me and I couldn't believe he tried," Lovell said. "The strings were pressed down and he didn't make any noise."
Conatser was issued a misdemeanor citation and released. Conatser can resolve the charge by paying a fine or he can contest the charge in Sevier County District Court.
___
Information from: Texarkana Gazette, http://www.texarkanagazette.com
Tuesday, November 28, 2006
Funny Stuff From Dave Barry
"I'm making progress with my weight lifting: This very morning I 'bench-pressed' a total weight of - and here, to make it look more impressive, I will use the metric system - 4,082,331.33 centigrams. Lying on my back, I was able to lift this weight INTO THE AIR, then bring it back down onto my chest, thus completing a 'bench press.' Unfortunately, I couldn't get the weight back off my chest. Seriously: I was trapped. My wife had come to rescue me. She thought it was very funny; I heard her laughing all the way to the kitchen. I bet the pickle jar was laughing, too. I will kill it with a hammer, if I can ever lift my arms again."
Stupid News Story of The Day
(Even I know this wouldn't be a good idea.)
Man who tried to kill John Paul asks to meet Pope
ISTANBUL (Reuters) - The man who tried to kill Pope John Paul II in 1981 wants a day's leave from jail to discuss theology with Pope Benedict when he visits Turkey this week, his lawyer said on Monday.
"I (Mehmet Ali Agca) asked the Turkish government to release me for one day so that I can discuss theological issues with (Pope) Ratzinger," Agca said in comments passed on by his lawyer Mustafa Demirbag at a news conference.
"I want to discuss with him religious and mystic issues," Demirbag quoted Agca as saying.
Agca is serving a sentence for the killing of a newspaper editor in the 1970s and for robbery and is scheduled to be released from prison in 2010.
The former right-wing gangster served 19 years in an Italian prison for his attempted assassination of John Paul, before being pardoned at the late pope's behest in 2000 and extradited to Turkey.
The lead-up to Benedict's first visit to a Muslim country has been peppered with controversy. Turkish government leaders have been accused of reluctance to meet him, street protests have erupted against the visit and a gun was fired outside the Italian consulate in Istanbul.
Agca's motives for shooting Pope John Paul in Rome's St. Peter's Square remain a mystery. Some believe he was a hitman for Soviet-era East European security services alarmed by the Polish-born pontiff's fierce opposition to communism.
Monday, November 27, 2006
No more turkey!!!
Well, another Thanksgiving has come and gone, leaving behind it masses of turkey bones and leftovers for days and days. It also left me with a little indigestion, but what can you expect when you have what seems like 10 pounds of food on your plate? There is a reason why Thanksgiving comes once a year. If it came any more than that, we would have all died of overeating by now.
My mom is so turkeyed out that she said she is going to make spaghetti for Christmas. Yep. Spaghetti. I don't mind. I think if I have one more bite of turkey, I will start to sprout wings and a beak.
We didn't do much for Turkey Day. We just sat around, ate turkey and watched football....well, we kinda flipped between football and James Bond ("We" = "my dad" - he was the one with the remote). The next day, I ventured out into the dangerous world of shopping. I didn't go til around 6 pm, and by then, all the crazy earlybirds had shopped themselves out, leaving me parking spots and elbow room in the stores. I simply can't deal with crowded malls and parking lots any more. I have no patience.
My folks already gave me my Christmas presents. Yeah, I know it is early, but hey, I like presents! hehe. They gave me a portable DVD player and a photo printer for my digital camera, and a cool Atari thing you hook up to the tv and play. It's like totally retro, dude! It even has the old-style Atari joysticks.
Sadly, the photo printer wasn't compatible with my camera so I took it back to Target and exchanged it for one of those all-in-one copier/printer/scanner deals that can also print photos. I finally got it hooked up (after fighting with tangled cords and dust - oh man, the dust!). And after seeing how dusty it was under the desk, I proceeded to dust the rest of my room....then the bathroom....then the living room. All of that seems normal enough, but when you tell people that you were up til 3 am dusting and cleaning, they start to look at you a little funny. I never said I was normal though.
My mom is so turkeyed out that she said she is going to make spaghetti for Christmas. Yep. Spaghetti. I don't mind. I think if I have one more bite of turkey, I will start to sprout wings and a beak.
We didn't do much for Turkey Day. We just sat around, ate turkey and watched football....well, we kinda flipped between football and James Bond ("We" = "my dad" - he was the one with the remote). The next day, I ventured out into the dangerous world of shopping. I didn't go til around 6 pm, and by then, all the crazy earlybirds had shopped themselves out, leaving me parking spots and elbow room in the stores. I simply can't deal with crowded malls and parking lots any more. I have no patience.
My folks already gave me my Christmas presents. Yeah, I know it is early, but hey, I like presents! hehe. They gave me a portable DVD player and a photo printer for my digital camera, and a cool Atari thing you hook up to the tv and play. It's like totally retro, dude! It even has the old-style Atari joysticks.
Sadly, the photo printer wasn't compatible with my camera so I took it back to Target and exchanged it for one of those all-in-one copier/printer/scanner deals that can also print photos. I finally got it hooked up (after fighting with tangled cords and dust - oh man, the dust!). And after seeing how dusty it was under the desk, I proceeded to dust the rest of my room....then the bathroom....then the living room. All of that seems normal enough, but when you tell people that you were up til 3 am dusting and cleaning, they start to look at you a little funny. I never said I was normal though.
Caption This!
"Dude, I think he's dead..."
"Nah....that's how he always looks."
Post your own funny caption in a comment if you wanna.
Funny Stuff From Dave Barry
"Frank Florio sent in a obituary-page announcement from the Watertown (New York) Times that states: 'To everyone and anyone who was in any way involved in my husband's passing, a heartfelt thank-you."
Stupid News Story of The Day
(Well, color me ironic.)
Official loses big skimming gambling funds
CALGARY, Alberta (Reuters) - A top anti-addiction official in the western Canadian province of Alberta skimmed nearly half a million dollars from his employer to feed his own gambling habit, the province's top auditor said on Friday.
Auditor General Fred Dunn alleged in a report that Lloyd Carr, who ran the tobacco-reduction unit of the Alberta Alcohol and Drug Abuse Commission, used five false contracts to scam C$441,298 ($390,000) from the government agency, which funds programs and treatment services for alcohol, drug and gambling addictions.
The auditor's report said Carr, who could not be reached for comment, had admitted to misappropriating the funds and using part of the cash to put a downpayment on a house, pay household expenses and repay a vehicle loan.
About C$116,000 was said to have been withdrawn from automatic teller machines in casinos.
Carr was fired in September. Criminal charges have not been filed, although police have been notified.
($1=$1.13 Canadian)
Sunday, November 26, 2006
This post is censored for your protection
I just finished watching Titanic on some cable tv channel (TNT or TBS or something). Yeah, I know....total chick flick....but then, I am a chick so it is ok. Of course, it left me teary-eyed....no, not from the part where Jack gets all icy and blue and then dead....no. The part that gets me is when the old Rose goes to the end of the boat and throws the necklace into the ocean. Why does that part always get me? I have NO clue. Yet it does. Every time.
Anyway, the reason for this post was not to tell the world how much of a bawl baby I am. No. The thing that made me write this is how stupid and silly censors can be (like my alliteration there? hehe). Now I can (sorta) understand why they would block out the topless scene in the movie. It is cable, but it ain't no HBO. But is there really a reason why they would have to blur out the boobs on a drawing??? Yes. You heard that right. When they showed the drawing of Rose (sans clothes), they blurred out her boobs. It was a drawing for Pete's sake! Paper and charcoal. Ugh. How stupid. Yet, in the scene where Jack is drawing Rose, they show him drawing her boobs....nipples and all. Good lord. Censors have gone bananas!
Yet, they still allow Steven Seagal movies to run on tv. How about censoring lousy acting, people?
Nevermind. That would probably eliminate about half of the shows on tv.
Anyway, the reason for this post was not to tell the world how much of a bawl baby I am. No. The thing that made me write this is how stupid and silly censors can be (like my alliteration there? hehe). Now I can (sorta) understand why they would block out the topless scene in the movie. It is cable, but it ain't no HBO. But is there really a reason why they would have to blur out the boobs on a drawing??? Yes. You heard that right. When they showed the drawing of Rose (sans clothes), they blurred out her boobs. It was a drawing for Pete's sake! Paper and charcoal. Ugh. How stupid. Yet, in the scene where Jack is drawing Rose, they show him drawing her boobs....nipples and all. Good lord. Censors have gone bananas!
Yet, they still allow Steven Seagal movies to run on tv. How about censoring lousy acting, people?
Nevermind. That would probably eliminate about half of the shows on tv.
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